Friday, September 23, 2011

The Well-Behaved Child...

If you haven't read The Well-Behaved Child: Discipline That Really Works by John Rosemond, you should. I thought it was a brilliantly written book covering the basics of child discipline: the parent. Yes, shocking I know, but the real work of raising children begins with the parent. This is not a book that will tell you how to make your children do what you want. Believe it or not, you cannot make other people change their behavior. (You can influence them and guide them, but the choice is ultimately theirs.) Rather, it will help you change the only person you can: yourself. It will tell you how to be a leader in your home and how to create an environment that is calm and positive.

I don't know about you, but my home and my parenting style was not characterized by the word calm. I was stressed and upset by most things. I would warn and plead until I either blew up or gave up. While my children were disobeying and pushing their limits, I knew the problem was my own. I knew I was doing something wrong. I just didn't know what. I read many books on parenting, and while most were inspirational and practical, nothing seemed to work...at least not for long.

The philosophies in this book made a lot of sense to me and they were what I needed to hear. I can't say my home is perfect now (it never will be, we're all human), but my attitude and outlook is better and I'm working on developing habits that are making me into the person I need to be for my children. So if you feel like you need a different way to do 'parenting,' then you should read this book. It's not easy; but it's simple, straightforward, and worth it. I needed to start living out my responsibility as a parent which is so much more than providing food and shelter and stuff...it is providing a positive example and firm boundaries. Hard. Much harder than I want it to be. But "the one who called you is faithful, and he will do it." (1 Thess. 5:24) Thank you Lord for changing my heart!

Also, as a side note, I wish I had read this book before I started teaching...it probably would have helped a lot! So I'm also recommending it to teachers and future teachers even though it is written to parents.

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